7 Quick Takes: The Path of Least Resistance

A whole weekend's worth of entertainment at your fingertips. Click to read more.

1.

The 4th grade science book had this explanation of charge (negative, positive, etc) that was just not computing with a certain child. Trying to figure out how to explain what the girl needed to know was going to take more brain power than I wished to exert.  So I fetched the boy’s old snap circuit kit, and said, “Read the directions, make a couple of these, and then we’ll talk.”

She loves them.  She’s made maybe twenty of the projects now.

And the SuperHusband came home and explained the habits of those wiley electrons in terms we could all understand.

2.

In his explanations, he observed electrons are a lot like people.  Certain children, for example, would much rather we evenly populate the rooms of the house, than have three girls crowded together in one bedroom.  It was an analogy our people-person girl grasped immediately.

3.

On the evening walk after dinner, Mr. Boy proposed seminars that run the opposite direction.  “People Skills for Engineers”, for example.  In which you explain that people are a lot like electrons.

4.

Every time your blood pressure spikes from reading about offensive jury verdicts in which parents are paid millions to publicly wish their children dead, Allie Hathaway’s the perfect choice for your offering up. Have I mentioned that reading the news is a near occasion of sin for me?  You might have noticed.

5.

Benadryl season, here.  I ran out of the liquid.  Seven-year-old had dark circles under her eyes, perpetual sneezing, and was losing her voice.  But the pill.  It doesn’t want to go down.

Until I remembered this stuff:

Now she’s very punctual in reminding me when she needs her next dose.

6.

We weren’t sure whether our dog would get along with our friends’ dogs during the pending staycation, in which all Fitz creatures under a certain age vacate castle premises for the weekend.  So we ran a test the other day.  One of the host dogs was not pleased at the arrival of the guest dog, and our pup insisted on saying a few pointed words back .  The altercation slowly edged them towards the pool.

Our dog, unaware she was backing up towards the water, fell right in.  She swam to the side, and my friend showed her the way up the steps.

And after that, the dogs got along just fine.

7.

And with that, I’m out of here, and offline, until sometime Monday.  Think I might send the telephone off with the kids, too.  Have a great weekend!

***

UPDATE: Thank You Facebook Helpers.  The new page name is: www.facebook.com/JenFitz.writes.  You guys are the best.

(Meanwhile SuperHusband and I are enjoying an eerily silent weekend.  I’ll check back at the combox and all that come Monday, or whenever we lose our un-plugged concentration and just have to ignore each other for a while.)

3.5 Time Outs: Try Not to Think About It

Thanks once again to our host Larry D. at Acts of the Apostasy, who lives with a teenage driver.

Click for the whole story.

1.

When my big kids were little, they played Mass in the bathroom. The necessary accessories were:

• Holy Water
• Bible
• Crackers for Communion

They said the Lord’s Prayer, and read from the Bible, and it was all very heartwarming.

Now my current 5-year-old has taken to setting up a church for the hippos and bunnies.  The required items are:

• Drum Set
• Offering Envelopes
• Collection Basket
• Bulletins

She makes sure there’s a nursery in her pillow-fort church building.

2.

She also likes to play pirates.  I tried to serve her hardtack and sauerkraut for lunch today, but she wasn’t convinced it was real pirate food.  She voted for fish sticks.

3.

A friend is keeping the kids for us this weekend so we can get away for a couple vacation together.  We priced hotels in one town (expensive, yikes), looked at the time required to go down to our favorite patron’s free beach house (too long a drive), decided camping was too much bother to count as R&R,  and now are trying to decide . . . which room of the house?  We keep telling the kids we’re gonna sleep in their bunkbeds while they’re gone.  They think we are joking.

3.5

 . . . James Herriot.  Seriously.  Me.  I’d never guessed.

***

It’s Link Day.  Guys you  get your man card punched double if you leave boy links on a girl blog.  Surely you aren’t going to be out-linked by a girl, are you?  One link per comment so you don’t get accidentally stuck in the automated spam dungeon.  Jane-Austen themes purely optional.

Oh and look, I have a link.  I stuck up a post at Amazing Catechists yesterday, on how to teach about the sacrament of marriage when your students’ families are not 100% on board.  I meant to wait a bit before posting it, but then I needed to send it to somebody, so I went ahead and put it up.  One thing that might surprise you — this is a topic where the United State Catholic Catechism for Adults really comes into its own.  It’s as if the bishops have some practice with these situations.

7 Quick Takes: Lucky Women

Where is the brain? The other Jen F. wants to know. Trust me, it's not here.

1.

It’s been a long few days here at the Castle.  I would be very grateful for your prayers.

2.

This is hilarious: “Teach Yourself a New Culture in 100 Easy Lessons”, in which we see how a Haitian man studying English describes the pictures in the reading book.  I want the whole series.

 

3.

Lent report:

1) Yeah, we pretty much stink at prayer-n-fasting.  Especially when housework is supposed to fit in their somewhere.

2) But I did have an Adrian Monk Moment, and clean the yard in a frenzied response to stress and frustration.  It looks really nice.  Or it did 24 hours ago, anyhow.

3) And then here’s what happened: We planned to meet Fr. W for lunch because after six months of trying, dinner just wasn’t happening.  Too busy.  And we decided that ‘at the restuarant’ was smarter than ‘at our house’.  And this morning I thought, “Yes, I’m so glad it’s at the restaurant, because this place is a wreck.”  And then I realized: “This place is waaaaay cleaner then the first time he came over last summer.  For one thing, at this time I would not need to send the children out on an hour-long mission to “get rid of the disgusting things”.

So, yes.  Progress.  Not as stellar of progress as my vivid imagination had envisioned.  But it’s something.

The Fitz House, Now 75% Less Disgusting!

4.

You thought you could just pray for my intention up there in #1. No can do.   Allie Hathaway. Right now. 

. . . Okay good. Thanks!

5.

Helen Alvare e-mailed me (and 18,000 of her closest friends, I’m pretty sure) with the reminder that:

 . . . The Obama Administration has put real accommodation of religious employers, insurers, and individuals off the table. And they have managed to get leading media to continue to claim that women are on the side of shutting down religious witness on the issue of the “free” birth control in employer insurance plans.

If you’re female and you haven’t signed the Women Speak for Themselves letter, do it now, here.

And this the Facebook page:  facebook.com/WomenSpeakForThemselves.

[H/T to the inimitable Mrs. Tollefsen for the head’s up about the letter and the encouragement to sign it.  They let me on, so they’ll take anybody.]

6.

Bearing links to a really cool history article on eugenics, politics, and the Irish in 1940.  Click on her link and read the whole thing — very well-researched and written account of a suspicious marriage certificate, and the man who made it so, 52 years after the wedding took place.  For that matter, if you’re having withdrawal because you don’t like how my 3-D life is interfering with your goofing-off schedule, Bearing’s been pretty much rocking the house lately, so you just go read her for a while.

7.

And that’s it.   Catholic Writer’s Conference starts tomorrow.  My yard is clean.  My blog is sad and lonely.  The weather is beautiful.  My truck is pale yellow from the pine pollen.  My 5 year-old has a new green plaid outfit made by her 10-year-old sister from scrap fabric, just in time to keep the neighbor kid from pinching her tomorrow.   I have given up all hope of predicting the future, and now consider my calendar to be a work of speculative fiction.

Oh speaking of saint’s feast days, last night I read the account of St. Abraham Kidunaia.  And I thought as I read, “Gee, his poor fiance, abandoned on the eve of the wedding, when he fled to the desert and locked himself in a cell.”  And then I read a little further, and concluded: “Probably once she learned he was planning to wear the same goatskin coat for the next 50 years, she was okay with it.”

 

3.5 Time Outs: Reading, Writing, Housekeeping

Thanks once again to our host Larry D. at Acts of the Apostasy, who didn’t call my parents when I skipped class last week.

Picaken Alert - Viewer discretion advised.

1.

Dorian Speed’s taken up the discussion of Catholic Arts and Letters over at her place.  I’m glad she did, because I was totally stewing over that OSV article.  Rather than be a combox hog, I put my comments into a post at CWG.

(Hint: Anyone who says “there’s too much catechesis out there” is just itching for a fight.)

2.

We’ve got a big fat Lenten FAIL going on here at the castle.  Vomitorium duty sure didn’t help, but let’s be honest, it was already falling apart before ever I was thrust down the black hole.    But if there’s one thing I’m good for, it’s perpetual hopefulness.  Is there any chance Good Housekeeping is one of the gifts of the Holy Spirit?  I think a need a mega-novena.  Or probably just to get back on the wagon.

3.

Ah, but look, I do have a special intention for which the grace of Holy Spirit is needed.  If you would please, just go ahead and pray.  You’ll know your prayers were answered if you never, ever, have any idea what it was you prayed for.  That would be so great.  I would love it.

3.5

When I’m sick, I read.  It’s my vice.  So last week I pulled down one yet-untouched book in the rainy-day queue, read half a chapter, was disgusted by the unexpectedly crass language, and threw it away.  Then I picked up selection-in-waiting #2, and wow!  Who knew I’d love . . .

***

Okay that’s all for today.  I’m trying to catch back up on my Kolbe Reviews this week, get the other half the Doctors of the Church review re-written since the internet ate it on Thursday afternoon as part of my need for Jen-mortification, and I’m hoping to have something new up at Amazing Catechists, I know not when, but soon.  Ish.

Meanwhile, It’s Link Day.  Other people than Sandra are allowed to post links, though she’ll always be the leader, since she specializes in finding cool stuff.  One link per comment so you don’t get stuck in the spam dungeon.

Hey look — I wrote something last week. Just not here.

In case you didn’t see it pop up at about 70 places around the internet (okay just four that I know about), here’s my contribution to Chris Weigand’s Lenten devotional series.  In which I accidentally ponder yesterday’s Gospel for year A instead of for year B, despite checking three times to be sure.  Happy accident, though.  I think the woman at the well has been getting more bad press than she deserves.

 

Will the House Do what the Senate Wouldn’t?

Here’s where you can see the text of House Bill HR1179.  Basic-model conscience protection — what the constitution promises, it just lays out in general terms as applies to the health care bill.  You can look here to see whether your congressional representative is a sponsor.

7 Quick Takes: Doing it Wrong

Click to see more takes.

1.

My ashes have worn off.  Anyone know where I can get them touched up?  I made it till Sunday being moderately virtuous in the life of prayer and penitence, and then . . . well, some of us are more “childish” than “childlike” in our faith.  But God is merciful, and every day is new.  Back to it.

1B

I’m contractually obligated to tell you:  You are doing Lent wrong.

At least, I think that must be a line in the Catholic Bloggers Handbook, because that seemed to be the theme this past week.  Probably my punishment for too much internet and not enough diligence.

Take away lesson: If you are praying and fasting the wrong way, for the wrong reasons, and entirely too lightly, we the Catholic Bloggers of the World are here to let you know.  You see how convenient it is, giving spiritual direction to complete strangers?  So much simpler.   You can say thank you anytime.

2.

But if you are putting sand in your holy water fonts, that is just plain wrong.  It’s not my fault that I have to link to the grumpiest priest on the internet in order for you to find that out.  Tip for mothers of tween boys:  My son loves Fr. R.  What’s not to love, between the guns and the complaining about lousy hymns?  The girls got mad at me for reading one of his posts aloud — bad language (for our house).  I used the “just quoting a priest” defense.

Anyway, I figure it’s best to go ahead and get the boy hooked on crotchety right-wing gun-enthusiast priests, because then at least our arguments can be fun.

2B

The boy recommends you watch Matrix run on Windows XP.  I agree.

3.

Are we the only Catholic home where the wall and floor beneath the mini-holy water font are now very, very blessed?  I’m divided between whether that means we are very bad Catholics or just that much more desperate for God’s blessings.

4.

If you want to do one thing right today, quick stop reading and say a prayer for Allie Hathaway.

5.

Look, I’m a grown-up now! I told Lisa Mladinich that she’d have to re-name her site “Pretty Good Catechists”, or “Amazing Catechists Plus Also Jen Sometimes”.  She told me the no, she’s expanding the “amazing” brand to reach out the “It’s amazing anyone let you be a catechist” segment, and I was the perfect choice to lead that charge.*

Anyway, I posted one column at AC introducing myself, so if you aren’t sure who I am, quick go look.  I’ll stick up a regular catechist-y column sometime soon, and you can be sure I’ll let you know about that.  Double bonus if you go: You can see my picture instead of just a pile of rocks.  My writer friends are all patting me on the back.  Because now if you ever meet me somewhere, and I’m trying to stick my head through a very small window, sideways, you’ll be able to identify me right away.

6.

There’s a rumor that my first column at CatholicMom.com is going to appear tomorrow (Saturday) morning.  I’m interested to see what I have to say.  Something about homeschooling.**

7.

Blair of Blair’s Blessings pointed me (and many others) to the free audio stories for kids at EWTN’s site.  Do you see how happy and sweet her kids are?  She does things right.

***

*That is a COMPLETE FABRICATION. Lisa Mladinich is a friendly, cheerful person unlike your hostess here, and she would never ever say something like that.  I had to make it up.

**Lisa Hendey has you send in your first two columns before you start.  I don’t know which one she’ll put up first.  I love the suspense — now I have to get on the internet right away at 9:00am Saturday to find out.

Where I write.

Since Jen Fulwiler says she really wants to know.

UPDATE: Click on this link to see her space, and find out about adding your own submission.  I’m fascinated by how similar our spaces are, right down to mandatory accessories — dining-room chandelier, children’s art . . . but I don’t have a pretty basket for Other People’s Things.  I just chuck your stuff in the hall.  I should get more civilized.

This is the study, which is where I like to write.  Because it has the giant slow-but-accessorized computer we all fight over, except not the boy anymore because this Christmas the grandparents tricked out his long-saved-for-laptop with everything a boy could need.

But other people demand use of the big machine.  Which means I grab my little computer and wander someplace like this:

No, it is not this green right now.

or like this:

No, it is not this orange right now.

Or wherever I can hide and the people don’t find me.

FYI for editing, my favorite thing is to print out a hard copy, grab a magic marker, and go to this place all by myself:

But usually I just work at home.

***

Goofy tip for the under-networked: If I write something on my laptop, eventually I have to send it over to the big computer for printing out, adding a photo, etc etc.  Or maybe I was working on the big computer, and someone else needed it, so I’ve got to send it the other way.  So I just e-mail it to myself.

Well here’s the funny thing I learned on Monday. . . in Yahoo, even before the e-mail arrives in the inbox, you can just walk over to the other computer and open the ‘sent items’ file.

I know all you technical people are laughing now.  You’re welcome.

3.5 Time Outs: Everybody Else

Thanks once again to our host Larry D. at Acts of the Apostasy, who rocked my world this morning when I saw his post on Picaken.  I’m not certain if it’s more like a penance or a deadly sin, but, wow.  Just wow.

Click this picture to avoid Picaken and be transported safely to 3.5 Time Outs.

1.

Sarah R’s secret plot is a secret no longer.  She’s started a word-by-word series on the Hail Mary.  You can read about “Hail” here, and “Mary” here.  My word, like I said the other week, is “women”, so I have a little bit of time.  Sarah assures me that my getting selected for that word was purely dumb luck the grace of God.  Or just the way the list of bloggers happened to line up with the list of words.

2.

If you didn’t already sign up for the online Catholic Writer’s Conference, today tomorrow is your very last chance until next year.  [Updated because yes, I’ve been writing the wrong date all day long.  Registration goes until Feb 29th, and is closed come March 1st.]

Don’t cry when you read my post coming soon to CWG about pitch sessions, and say to  me, “But I didn’t know!”  Because you know what?  I told you.  Today.  This blog is not exactly a no-whining-zone, but I do limit the topics.

3.

The Fulwil-inator must be getting nervous, Larry, because she’s making a move for Wednesdays.  The Curt Jester has already aired his contribution.  My main writing location was shown here way back during the homeschool photofest, but maybe if I am goofing off feeling diligent, I’ll get an official entry for tomorrow.  Or not.  Just how industrious a minion am I?

3.5

 . . . wasps.

***

That’s my 3.5.  Last week’s open-link session did just what I’d hoped, and if you were smart you clicked on my friend Sandra’s links, because she’s the one who sends me 90% of the cool things that land in my inbox.

If you read here and have a link to your own work or someone else’s, consider this your invitation to just post it in the combox, rather than suffering that long horrid process where you e-mail me and then pray I don’t get sidetracked before I remember I wanted to tell the whole world about that cool thing you shared, but I forgot, and now you wonder if I hate you or hate your link, when actually, I just forgot.

[So far, no people that I hate have ever e-mailed me, so I promise you’re safe.  I’m having a hard time thinking of anyone I do hate, and that’s a sign of something good, I think, but let’s not get too precise about whether that’s referring to my spiritual condition or just my cave-dwelling lifestyle.  Maybe it’s that you who e-mail me are just that awesome.]

–> Post as many links as you like, but only one per comment, because the evil anti-spam automaton will gobble any post that has more than one link, and we don’t want that.

If you do get stuck in the spam dungeon, you have my permission to e-mail me and tell me what happened, and I’ll wade into the mire and fish out your comment and hit the approve button.  I’m going to quick drain the moat before I publish this so it won’t be quite so stinky down there.

7 Quick Takes: I’m not ready yet.

Click to see more takes.

1.

Lent Report:  The festival of cleaning combined with our new penitential life is starting to show results.  Neighbor kid who lives in a clean house all the time is unimpressed.  But I am.  For one thing, the finally collasping remains of the Leaf Fort have now been moved to a newly-constructed giant compost garden, where in theory we’ll grow fewer insects and more compost this year.

2.

On the other hand, less school work is being accomplished.  But we will catch back up.  We are still in the initial stages of our new, clean life, and there was some digging-out to do.

3.

I have at least one child interested in attending daily mass more often.  (By “more often” I mean “at all, ever”.)  I’m going to see how doing just Fridays works.

4.

But “just Fridays”, I mean to say, “Yesterday I did not race the kids to mass and adoration even though in theory we could have squeezed it in on the way to Grandma’s house, but seriously?  It wasn’t going to work. ”

As I told Father last week, sometimes trying to haul everyone to church is a near occasion of sin in itself.

I want my kids to associate weekday mass with peaceful, reflective times with God, not with Mom Yelling At You That Your Pants Need To Be Ironed Because You Did Not Put Them Away Properly And Quick Get That Food Off The Table Do You Not Remember We Are Cleaning Up After Ourselves Because We Are Growing In Holiness Quit Making That Face At Your Sister.

 

5.

But what I did do yesterday was something new: I read a book during adoration.    Dropped the kids at Grandma’s, returned library books, then stopped by the church as I sometimes (not always) do on a grandma day.

Normally I would pray for a very small amount of time, and then go over to McDonald’s, buy a cup of coffee, and read a book.  I always puzzled over people who read during Eucharistic adoration, because it felt sort of like if you had an audience with the Queen of England and you whipped out a magazine because you were so bored.  You know, because it’s so much more reverent to dash in,  say hello, and wave goodbye with a, “Nice seeing you, gotta run off to McDonald’s now”, right?

The book was Knox’s Retreat for Lay People.  And it would be a good helpful book if read at McDonald’s.  But read right there in the presence of Jesus? Wow. What a difference.  Talk about a serious book club.  Each point became something I could pray about — that is, talk face to face with Jesus right then and there.  Not contemplate while gazing at the ceiling, or the clouds, or even an icon or crucifix.  But right there with the Real guy.  Sheesh.   I’d never guessed.  Seriously cool.

 

6.

Pray for Allie Hathaway.  I can’t think of a better way to spend your Friday.

7.

“I’m Not Ready Yet” is what our first pair of preschoolers would call out from the bed in the evenings.  They’d lay there in their room, shouting out in a chorus, “I’m not ready yet!  I’m not ready yet!” in protest of their bedtime.  We have it on video.  It has now entered the family vocabulary as our all-purpose expression of dislike for less enjoyable responsibilities.

In other bits of castle dialect these days: Everything is coming back to Mr. Timn.